For thought...and a chuckle
  • > Hope you like these as much as I did!

    > Can you cry under water?

    > How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

    > Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

    > Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

    > Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

    > What disease did cured ham actually have?

    > How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
    >

    > Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
    f a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
    >

    > Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
    >

    > Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
    >

    > Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
    >

    > Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
    >
    immy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
    >

    > Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

    > If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
    >

    > Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
    >

    > If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
    >

    > If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
    >

    > If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    > Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
    >

    > Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    > Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

  • > Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

 

 

    • \
      > Subject: FW: FW: For thought...and a chuckle
      >
      >
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > Hope you like these as much as I did!

      >
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > Can you cry under water?
      >
      >
      > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
      >
      >
      > How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
      >
      >
      > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
      >
      >
      > Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > What disease did cured ham actually have?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
    >
    >
    > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >
    > Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?